In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize