making cat noises will not fix the situation.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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