sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
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He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
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I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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