it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.