I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
