loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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