i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
