Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
