So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
