I faked an abortion last night.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
They are going to name an STD after you.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
COCAINE IS GR8
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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