Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize