he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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