I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
