My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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