Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
