So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
