Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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