everyone is single if you try hard enough
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
