just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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