So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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