I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
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