she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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