Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize
