I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
