I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
This toilet bowl is my home.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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