Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
she peed on how many people?
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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