I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
