So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
