I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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