WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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