I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Randomize
