I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize