This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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