that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
