therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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