I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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