I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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