he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
