Buhtt sex?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Randomize
