She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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