at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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