What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
