I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
