Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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