It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize