Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
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