I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
dude i'm inner monologue high
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Randomize
