Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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