you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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