did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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